Anthony Suresh
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY TO THE DEAREST COUPLES
He sends flowers when she really wants is time to talk.
She gives you a hug when what he really needs is a lovingly cooked meal. The Challenge is not your love- it’s your Love Language!
What speaks volumes to you may be meaningless to your spouse. A contented and happy employee is a boon to any organization and this enhances productivity. The Love languages help in understanding each other’s unique needs. These skills, aim at developing an individual’s personality and character…. base of a person’s emotional quotient and consequently success in Marriage life. “For what does it profit a spouse to gain the whole world and lose love in marriage life?”
Love languages are crucial for successful marriages. Couples need to identify the primary love language and express it appropriately. If the primary love language of the man is good food and that of woman is affirmation, appreciation and quality time, both need to match to be effective.
Man and woman when they are attracted, are two different personalities. This is mere external appearance and emotional. In marriage, the commitment is strengthened and their character comes to the fore. Scot Peck in his book ‘the road less travelled’ asks us to commit ourselves when we are ‘out of love’ rather than ‘in love’.
‘In love’ is not real because it is not an act of will or conscious choice. Firstly, we fall in love at inopportune time and not necessarily with the right people. Secondly, it is effortless; love requires discipline or conscious effort. Thirdly, the parties to it are not genuinely interested in the personal growth of the other.
Marriage is for life and choosing the right partner is very crucial for a successful marriage. Character is more important than personality hence, ‘Right Choice’ is the mantra. Rational, volitional love is the kind of love to which the sages have always called us.
Seven habits for a happy and effective marriage.
1. Habit of appreciation, affirmation and recognition.
2. Habit of spending quality time with the spouse.
3. Habit of exchanging gifts.
4. Habit of apologising, forgiving, forgetting and releasing.
5. Habit of loving service- at home and outside.
6. Habit of sharpening the saw.
7. Habit of self-expression through physical touch and loving communication.
